from "The Anal Retentive Gourmet" (aka Tanith Tyrr)

4 Hostess Twinkies
1 medium-sized Valencia orange, organic and grown without any preservatives
1 bunch frisee, weighing exactly 6 1/2 ounces
1 large live goose
14 bushels corn grown in a French vineyard
1 plastic serving fork

Instructions: Mash up the Twinkies into a uniformly grey-brown paste. Confine the goose in a very small yard and force feed it the 14 bushels of corn. This may take up to six months. Don't worry; the Twinkies will keep. Slice the orange with a Henckels knife - Cutco simply won't *do*, dear. Carefully layer orange slices onto the head of frisee lettuce in the exact shape of John F. Kennedy's nose. Kill the goose and remove its liver. Mash it into the Twinkie paste with a colander and pack the mixture tightly into a French pastry horn. Squeeze it out carefully onto the orange-frisee mixture and discard the pastry. Shove a large plastic serving fork in the middle to convey the message that this is to be eaten rather than used as a creative centerpiece, else your guests may be confused. Serve very, very cold.

Bon appetit,

Tanith Tyrr

collected by Bert Christensen
Toronto, Ontario